Tag Archives: menstruation

Period laziness

I have written previously about period in topics like “There is no such thing as a happy period”, “I hate those cycles” and “Period carving”. Today I am here to vent some more of my annoyance regarding the same matter.

You have to forgive me if you think I write about it a lot but you need to understand, it comes every month so there is no way I can avoid it. While I was pregnant and the first 6 months after Chhori was born, I didn’t have it and it was just amazing not to have to think about it. Then suddenly, it decided to be a part of my life again. The very first time after the baby, when it happened, I was so upset. I knew it would come back but I didn’t want it to because along with it, it brought mood swings, unnecessary cravings and laziness.

period_pain

When I am about to have a period, I know it and still can’t control my annoyance at every small thing. I become moody and lazy. I haven’t done my morning exercise for a whole week this week and I keep eating junk food. And all the Easter eggs around is not helping me in anyway at all. All I want to do is sit on the sofa, eat chips and watch TV.

easter eggs

I really feel sorry for AS during this time because anything he does is not good enough and he could do nothing right. I try my best to be good at times but I am not always successful.

I really don’t know how my head works during these times. I will be clam and happy and suddenly, I am angry at small things which, I know at the back of my mind, don’t matter at all. What’s with that? Seriously, I don’t have control over my mood at all.

Now that we have a beautiful baby in our life I don’t want this period monster to take over our life for 4-5 days a month. I have read and heard about things I could eat/drink/do during this time to make me somewhat normal. If you have any special tricks like that which has worked for you please share. I really think I need help otherwise I will waste a few days every month becoming angry and irritated unnecessarily.

Take care everyone,

M from nepaliaustralian

XOXO

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Period craving

I feel like I talk about periods all the times, I have talked about it in the post like “There is no such thing as a happy period” and “I hate those cycle.” Today I am coming back to it again and talking about period carving.

In the beginning I didn’t understand my urge for food especially just before the period and during it so I would get stressed as I was eating a lot of junk food at those times but with some research I managed to calm down as I found out that it is normal.

Just like other PMS symptoms, such as cramping, bloating, and moodiness, cravings are caused by fluctuations in the hormones. I believe most women and especially men are completely unaware of this thus my blog about it.

According to experts a woman’s need for magnesium, sugar, carbohydrates, salt and water increases dramatically between ovulation and menstruation. Our caloric needs fluctuates through our cycle. That means we need to eat more on some days than others. Right before we start our period, the levels of the hormones estrogen, serotonin, and cortisol in our body will shift. These hormonal changes result in cravings. The bad thing about these craving is that it leads me to binge excessively on crappy food like chips, fried food and chocolates that leaves me feeling bloated.

One common symptom of PMS is craving particular types of food. No wonder I want chocolate for snacks and samosa for tea. There are even days when I am so hungry that I feel like I can eat a whole elephant. That is the worst part as I feel that I can easily put on weight during those 7 days and I am back to square one in my weight loss plan.

I know the key to managing my cravings during this time of the month is to try to prevent myself from going overboard. So these days instead of denying myself, I indulge a bit. I go for smaller portions like these days I am enjoying Lindt dark chocolates with almond during period but just one small piece a day. I am eating whatever I want, but eat it in a mindful way. I believe that if you are mindful with the food you are craving you will feel satisfied with less, and may even realized that it is not what your body is actually asking for.

The good news is that according to the experts, this kind of moderate “indulgence” is unlikely to have much of an effect on our weight. Scientists have also demonstrated that most girls and women burn extra calories just prior to starting their periods. So, as long as you keep your chocolate “fixes” small, you should find that you can include them as part of a balanced, healthy diet.

For all the men out there, please get her what she wants to eat during this time as it is a part of the body cycle. And please do not lecture on how bad junk for the body is or how we look bloated as that it the last thing we want to hear. It will really help if there are people around who can understand us during this time.

Do you/your partner have period craving? What do you/she crave?

Take care everyone,

M from nepaliaustralian

XOXO

I hate those cycle

If you are a woman, you know what I am talking about and if you are a man, you will think you know what I am talking about.

I am talking about periods. It comes with a headache, cramps and mood swings (for most) uninvited each and every month for every woman in this planet. It is like you wish this cycle was once a year or once a life time. If you are a man, you know you have to deal with it as well. You are the one we vent our anger and frustrations on during that time. So indirectly you are affected by these cycles as well. If you still don’t know what I am talking about, let me spell it out for you, I am talking about MENSTRUATION.

When I was in school, during sex ed classes we were taught that a woman has mood swings during their periods. Hope all the boys were listening as they will be affected by this their whole life as well. It would be so sad if they were not listening ,thinking that’s only girl’s stuff because they are on the receiving end of the grief from their partners on those days.

The few hours in school did not prepare me for the cycles I have to go through every month of my life. As I mentioned in the post Bahra, we celebrated my becoming an adult with a few hundred people and lots of gifts but not even a word on what to expect and how it will affect my life.

I find that I am lucky that my period is not as bad as many of my friends. I will tell you the details later. Mine started really great with no pain at all. I used to play sports in school during my periods and I was perfectly fine. But then in the last few years, I started to get lower back pains. Then bad mood and irritation followed to make matters worse. When I googled it, it told me all that is normal. “What the hell!” was my reaction. “To be in pain and bad mood is normal?” Anyway I couldn’t do much so I tried my best not to let it affect my life. There are times I wish boys had this cycle rather than girls but then I have no control over nature.

I feel bad for the males of our species, like my husband, who have to put up with us when we are going through it. I know I am very unreasonable and cranky. Nothing he does will be right at that time. (Sorry my darling). But then I don’t know any other way to handle it.

Back to my friends. I really feel lucky when I see my friend who can’t go to work during these cycles. She has to take painkillers and lie on the bed at least for the first few days. She has missed so much in life due to them. She went to so many doctors but no solution yet.

Also I have an aunt who cries every time she goes through the cycle. When I was a kid, I had no idea why she was in so much pain. I really thought she had some horrible disease but later I realised it was just those time of the month.

I read in some reports that if you have really bad pain then you must see a doctor as it can be something serious like a sign of endometriosis, a condition in which cells from the lining of the womb, or uterus, grows in other parts of the body. Endometriosis can cause inflammation and the formation of scar tissue, leading to pain, irregular bleeding and, in severe cases, infertility and is common in women in their 30’s. I know it seems rare but this disease is believed to affect one in ten women but most of them are not even aware of it.

If you were born in a country like Nepal, talking about menstruation is taboo. You live with cramps, heavy flow and have to interact with people who are rude or unsympathetic. I remember being embarrassed to even talk about it and the irony is now I am writing a blog about it.

I really think young girls need to be taught everything they need to know about these cycles so they can take proper action in time. In this time and age, natural things like periods should be openly discussed and girls should be encouraged to get information about it. Also I believe every male needs to learn about this as well as they will be spending time with females in their life who are going through these cycles. I know there is no need to stop our life every 28 days but some women can’t help it. It will really help if there are people around who can understand us during this time.

Bahra

As I mentioned in my previous post Ihi’, every Newar girl have to perform the ritual called ‘Ihi’ and after ‘Ihi’, they have to perform the ritual called ‘Bhara’.

Bahra’ is also known as ‘’Bahra tyagu” in Newari and Surya Darshan or Gufa rakhne in Nepali. In this ceremony, the girl is married to the sun.

In some culture, this ceremony is done when the girl has her first menstruation and in other cultures, it occurs after they get an auspicious date from a priest .

It is believed that the girl is protected by the sun from bad people and the evils after this ceremony.

For this ceremony, a girl will stay in a room of her house for 12 days without seeing sunlight and not meeting any male person. ( I still don’t know the reason for this so please share if you know).

In the room at one corner, a cloth is put as Bahra Khayak (ghost) and worshipped by the girl as she is believed to be in possessed by evil. Before she eats anything, one portion needs to be separated for Khayak. If the ritual is not followed, it is believed, the Khayak will scare the girl at night. 

My Bahra ceremony

The hardest part of the ritual is not to eat salt during the first 6 days. I was only 13 years old when I had my Bahra and I remember crying for salt everyday as food doesn’t taste good without salt. As this culture is different among different families, I am writing about how members of my own family go through this tradition.

After the sixth day, close female relatives like maternal uncles (mama), dad’s sisters (fufu) and other relative will come and meet the girl with food like popcorn and Rotis and fruits. Also from the sixth day, there will be powder called ‘Koaa’ which is used by all the women to make them look beautiful. You have to follow a special direction to use this and it is meant to clean the skin. It is used especially by the Bahra girl to look good when she come out of hiding on the 12th day.

Step to use Koaa.

  • Wash your hands, legs and face with water first.
  • Mix the ‘Koaa’ with water and make a paste. Then put the paste all over your face, legs and hands
  • Leave it for a few minutes to dry.
  • Now rub oil on your hands and remove the paste from your face, legs and hands.

    Alha during Bahra

In these 12 days the girl will be entertained by her female friends and relatives. While I was in my room we had ludo, snake and ladder and dolls to play with. As my family was ok for me to hear male voice we had radio so we used to play it loud and dance.

Some days went really quick as I had many visitors around and then there were days which were so long, I couldn’t wait to go out.

On 12th day there will be a big celebration of the ending of this ceremony.

Surya darshan during Bahra

In the morning, the girl purifies herself  by taking a bath. Then she is dressed in bridal sari and make up. She will then be covered my shawl and take to the open space where Puja is performed. There will be Ganesh Puja first and then Surya Puja followed by Surya Darshan. It will be the first time the girl will see the sun in 12 days. Also Sindoor is put on the girl’s forehead as a symbol of marriage to the sun and a yellow string is put around her head.

Like in Ihi, there will be a special person who cuts toe nails for the girl and then paints the feet with red colour called ‘Alah’. Also, ‘Thaa bu’, a plate which has eggs, yogurt, wine, fruits, Roti, meat, fish and much more for the girlsto eat is served like in the real wedding.

Then she will be given Sagun and gifts by family and relatives. Also after this Puja, the girl will go with her relatives to a nearby temple and do more Puja.

In the evening of that day there will be a big bhoj (party) and lots of relatives and friends are invited.

After this ceremony the girl becomes an adolescent.