Tag Archives: vacation

Nepal doesn’t need to change, we do

Posted on August 25, 2012 | 12 comments

This article was published in +977 (a Nepalese Lifestyle Magazine in Australia) in  July-Aug 2012 issue.   

Even though we are away from home, most of us are very passionate about our motherland NEPAL and we have a long list of things we think Nepal needs to change in order to make it better for the future.  We are very happy to jump into any conversation on what is wrong in Nepal and never far behind when voicing our opinion about how Nepali politicians are so wrong.  If I asked you to tell me one thing you would change in Nepal if you were in power for a day, I am sure, you would join the bandwagon of people who have dreamed to turn Nepal into Switzerland.

We all know that Nepal has failed to make a permanent constitution since 2007 and all the delay has not helped our pessimistic attitude towards Nepal. The decade long civil war, the bandhs, and the corruption in the government are not only making us disappointed but strengthening the idea in our head that Nepal definitely needs to change.

I am sure most of us remember Nepal as the only Hindu kingdom in the world and a country which could attract tourists from around the world with her natural beauty and peace. Then in a blink of the eyes, things changed dramatically. First, the Maoist civil war killed thousands of our brothers and sisters followed by the Royal massacre which killed our beloved King, Queen and princes along with many other royal family members and then the unstable governments that haven’t been able to agree upon a constitution even after 5 long years.

It is 2012 now and things seem to be going downhill in Nepal. The tourism industry is one of the main sources of foreign currency in Nepal and provides many people with employment. Once the world’s most sought-after destinations for tourism; Nepal has lost millions of dollars in income from the tourism industry due to the headlines around the world about its bandhs and the negative publicity. I have a few friends around me who have always wanted to visit Nepal but they fear to travel there due to the fear for their own safety.

Government websites like http://www.smartraveller.gov.au in Australia has a warning for Australian citizens who wish to visit Nepal. They state

  • We advise you to exercise a high degree of caution in Nepal due to the uncertain political and security situation.
  • There have been violent incidents, including bomb attacks, at crowded locations and on public transport throughout the country.
  • Shortages of essential supplies (food, water, fuel, gas and kerosene for cooking) can occur with limited notice.
  • Black out (or load shedding) periods can have a significant impact on services, including in major tourist destinations. Crimes against foreigners, including tourists, such as assault and theft occur in Nepal due to the poor law and order situation.
  • Illegal roadblocks and enforced national or local strikes (bandhs) often occur without notice and may continue for lengthy periods resulting in the closure of businesses and vehicles not being allowed on the roads. At these times, access to the airport can be disrupted and taxis are not usually available.

If you are a tourist who is looking for a relaxing holiday away from home, would you choose a country which has so many problems? I definitely wouldn’t. I am not blaming smartraveller, as they have stated everything correctly in their website and are doing a great job of making the citizen of Australia aware about the real situation in Nepal.

This brings me to my point why there is still nothing wrong with Nepal. Nepal is still a very beautiful country and I still say this after I have seen a lot of countries around the world that attract tourist in the millions. The only problem right now is that we, the Nepali people, don’t appreciate her as much as we should.

Deforestation and land degradation is one of the biggest environmental problems in Nepal and people are responsible for that, not the country. There has been a loss of huge forest area which has resulted in floods, soil erosion, and stagnant agricultural output. At the same time population growth and improper use of agro-chemicals hasn’t help the environment either.

Political instability has become a huge problem for the country. The politicians need to realise that it is easy to say that they will make Nepal into Switzerland in a certain number of years but they have never paused to think how Switzerland became such great country. They fought so long and hard to established democracy in the country but they are fighting over power and money now when the country needs them most. While I was in Switzerland, I could imagine that if the infrastructure in Nepal, like better roads, could be developed then Nepal too could attract tourists like Switzerland. The thing we, the people, and also the politicians should understand is that there is no quick and easy way to success.

It is the country’s citizens who decide what the country will be like, for better or for worse and we as Nepalis seem to have followed the wrong path for a while now. Let me give you an example.  Most people heard that “If you spit in the streets of Singapore, you will be fined by the cops”. While on holiday in Singapore, I took a bus tour of the city and we had a Singaporean guide.  She was so passionate about her country that she made sure that the tourists in the bus followed all the rules while travelling with them; like not leaving the empty coffee or juice cups on the side of the road or no chewing gums as they are banned in Singapore. She was there enforcing all the rules that we normally expect cops to enforce. If every Singaporean has that attitude and love towards their country then definitely the country will prosper.

Now I ask you “Have you followed all the rules while you were in Nepal or enforced them on others?” If your answer is no then it is definitely time for us to change and take the responsibility of the country and guide it in the right direction. Many Nepalese who would never throw rubbish on the road or dare to break a traffic rule abroad will do it in Nepal without a second thought.

I just want to ask you a few simple questions:

Have you paid money to get your license?

Have you bribed government officials to expedite your work?

Have you bribed a traffic officer when he caught you doing an illegal U turn or speeding?

Have you bribed an airport official to take extra weight illegally or used someone with influence to make it happen? (Most of us going abroad are guilty of this one.)

There are many similar questions that I can ask but I’m sure you got my point. Be honest with yourself because your excuses are not good enough and you are contributing to the corruption in Nepal. You complain about the corruption and bad politicians of Nepal but when it comes to benefits for yourself, you don’t hesitate to bribe your way out. How can you be such a hypocrite? The worst part is that you would never do that in Australia, America or UK. You don’t hesitate in Nepal because you are confident that you can get away with it. I am not saying that I am a perfect citizen and I know most of are not but all of us need to change.

You might argue it is easy to maintain a country that is already in a good state but difficult to improve a country if it is in a bad state. I do agree with that but consider my previous example of Singapore. In the past Singapore had a big civil war between their Chinese, Indian and Malay citizens due to the difference in language, religion and culture but they rose above all those problems and came up with a solution to improve the country. Now they have four official languages: English, Chinese, Malay, and Tamil. They celebrate every religion and have holidays for the Chinese New Year, Vesak Day, Deepavali, Hari Raya Haji (Eid) and Christmas as well. They are one of the most prosperous countries in the world now.

So there definitely is a solution to every problem and we, the Nepali people, have to see it and work towards it.

The next time you think Nepal needs to change, pause for a moment and think what you can do to make that change? Instead of gossiping about our politicians and their wrong doings, let’s start with something small around us that we can improve. As each brick added makes a house stronger, every improvement that we make, makes the country better. We need to make everyone around us aware that a country is made up of its citizens and they can make or break the country. Let’s take responsibility of our own actions and not blame others for the state of the country. If the government is doing something wrong, we need to understand that they too are Nepali citizens and we have the power to make or break the government too. I am sure we all have learnt that from our experience of democracy until now. We do not depend on people who govern the country, they depend on us.

Let’s all set realistic goals and contribute whatever we can for the betterment of Nepal.

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Posted in Nepal, Published

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Friday the 13th

Posted on July 13, 2012 | 22 comments

This morning I came to work and was making breakfast in the kitchen. I was talking to my colleague while she was making her breakfast. She accidentally knocked her coffee cup and it smashed into a gazillion pieces. She was quite annoyed that she had to start the Friday morning cleaning the mess and was complaining about it. Just then one of our colleagues came in and remarked that it’s Friday the 13th today so a smashed cup isn’t unusual. It hadn’t occur to me before but after hearing him, I did some digging on the internet about it so here you go.

Normally, western society seems to be less superstitious than eastern society but Friday the 13th is a date considered to be bad luck in western superstition.

Does Friday the 13th freak you out? If so, hold on to your rabbit’s foot extra tight, because there are three of these supposedly unlucky dates in 2012, and today (July 13) is one of them, but the good news is it’s the last.

Read on for 13 strange facts about this day of superstition. (www.msnbc.msn.com)

1. This year is a special one for Friday the 13ths: There are three of them: Jan. 13, April 13 and July 13. The dates fall exactly 13 weeks apart. That hasn’t happened since 1984.

2. If that scares you, you may have paraskavedekatriaphobia (also known as friggatriskaidekaphobia). Those are the scientific terms for fear of Friday the 13th. Triskaidekaphobia is fear of the number 13.

3. It’s not clear when or why Friday the 13th became associated with bad luck. The association may be biblical, given that the 13th guest at the Last Supper betrayed Jesus. His crucifixion was the next day, apparently a Friday. Or maybe 13 suffers from coming after the more-pleasing number 12, which gets to number the months, the days of Christmas and even the eggs in a dozen. (There are also 12 signs of the zodiac, 12 gods of Olympus, 12 labours of Hercules, 12 tribes of Israel and 12 apostles of Jesus.)

4. Whatever the reason, fear of 13 has spread far and wide: Hotels and hospitals often skip the 13th floor, and even airports quietly omit gate 13 sometimes.

5. The next year in which we’ll have three Friday the 13ths is 2015. They’ll fall in February, March and November.

6. If you think your Friday the 13th is likely to be bad, be glad you aren’t a 14th-century Knight Templar. On Oct. 13, 1307, officers of King Philip IV of France raided the homes of thousands of these Crusades warriors, imprisoning them on charges of illegal activities. Though the charges weren’t proven, more than 100 died of terrible torture, according to “Tales of the Knights Templar” (Warner Books, 1995).

7. Fittingly, director of psychological thrillers Alfred Hitchcock was born on the 13th — Friday, Aug. 13, 1999, would have been his 100th birthday. Perhaps aptly titled “Number 13,” a film that was supposed to be Hitchcock’s directorial debut never made it past the first few scenes and was shut down due to financial problems. He allegedly said the film wasn’t very interesting. (Meanwhile, Fidel Castro was born on Friday the 13th, in August 1926.)

8. Why does the Friday the 13th superstition stick so firmly in our minds? According to Thomas Gilovich, who chairs the department of psychology at Cornell University, our brains are almost too good at making associations.

“If anything bad happens to you on Friday the 13th, the two will be forever associated in your mind, and all those uneventful days in which the 13th fell on a Friday will be ignored,” Gilovich said in a statement.

9. For pagans, 13 is actually a lucky number. It corresponds with the number of full moons in a year.

10. President Franklin D. Roosevelt is said to have avoided travel on the 13th day of any month, and would never host 13 guests at a meal. Napoleon and President Herbert Hoover were also triskaidekaphobic, with an abnormal fear of the number 13.

11. Mark Twain once was the 13th guest at a dinner party. A friend warned him not to go. “It was bad luck,” Twain later told the friend. “They only had food for 12.” Superstitious diners in Paris can hire a quatorzieme, or professional 14th guest.

12. Stockbroker and author Thomas W. Lawson, in his 1907 novel “Friday the Thirteenth,” wrote of a stockbroker’s attempts to take down Wall Street on the unluckiest day of the month. Reportedly, stock brokers after this were as unlikely to buy or sell stocks on this unlucky day as they were to walk under a ladder, according to accounts of a 1925 New York Times article.

13. This fear of Friday the 13th can be serious business, according to the Stress Management Center and Phobia Institute in Asheville, N.C., which, among other things, offers therapy to help people overcome their fear of the freaky Friday. Their estimates suggest hundreds of millions of dollars, up to $900 million, are lost due to people’s fear of flying or doing business as usual that day, though that number isn’t backed up with other estimates.

Do you believe in Friday 13th being unlucky?

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Let’s start with Amazing Dubai

Posted on June 19, 2012 | 19 comments

If a place manages to amaze you when you see it after a 14 hours flight and 28 hours with no sleep then I am sure that is an amazing place and that is what Dubai was for me. When we got off at Dubai International Airport, we could already feel that we were in Dubai as it was very big and massive as we had expected. The first thing I noticed was that the people who were working there were all men and all of them were wearing their traditional dress, tawb or taub (long white robe) and the headscarf (keffiyeh).

I think quite a few flights landed at the same time as we did since there was a long queue at immigrations. So we had to wait for a while before we could clear immigration and collect our baggage. Both me and AS were really happy to start the first leg of our vacation.  As soon as we got out of the airport, I felt the hot and humid air against my face. I knew that it was going to be really hot there but it was still a bit of a shock for my body as we had come from the cold Sydney weather. Anyway as we had airport transfer booked, we went to find the office of Arabian Adventures. It was the last office in the building.

Once we were there we were informed that it would be another 20 minute for our transfer to arrive. We had no choice but to wait. After 30 minutes we were escorted to our van and we were joined by a lady from Sydney. I was glad to be in the van as it had AC and was very comfortable. I noticed that they had taxis with a cream coloured body and red roof for normal use and cream body and pink roof to be used by only women. The drivers of those cabs were women as well. After nearly 20 minutes ride we were at our hotel, Marco Polo.

We had done a lot a of research for our hotel through travel advisor and it was one of the ones with a good review. It was supposed to be a four star hotel. My first impression was good as the hotel looked decent from outside. As soon as the van stopped, the porter came and took our suitcases. We checked into our room and hurried to freshen up to go out.

SS, a friend of mine from my school days, lives in Dubai and since it was Friday, their weekend, he had promised to show us Dubai. Due to the airport transfer delay , we were late arriving at the hotel so both of us were rushing to get ready before SS arrived at out hotel. When I had just finished my shower, we got a call from the reception that SS has arrived. I and AS were really tired but there was no time to rest so we hurried and got ready and went to meet SS.

I hadn’t seen SS for more than 15 years. When we decided to stop over in Dubai for our trip, I had some questions so when I saw him online on Facebook one day I asked him a few questions. He had asked me when we were coming to Dubai and when he realised that it would be Friday, he had offered to show us around that evening.

When we took the lift to the lobby and I saw SS, I felt very happy but at the same time it was a bit awkward. He seemed a bit different from I remembered and definitely was not a boy as I remembered. But all the awkwardness went away once we started talking, I realised that nothing had changed. It still felt like we were in school and we were still friends :). He told me he has been working in Dubai for the last eight years but his wife and two-year old boy is still in Nepal and he visited them every year. Along with him, he had his colleague, Mr. R. He was from Kerala, India and he had been living in Dubai for 15 years. They worked in the perfume industry and brought us some perfume as gifts :).

Mr. R, SS and AS in front of Deira creek

After the initial chitchat and introduction, we hopped into the car and we were off to see Dubai with the locals. Both of them seemed happy to show us around and we were excited to see the city despite being quite tired from the flight. The hotel we stayed was in Deira so the first stop was Deira Creek. There were lots of people enjoying the cool breeze at that time and obviously lots of tourist too. We could see the beautiful skyline from there as well as hundreds of boats. Some of them were for tourists, for sightseeing, while other were floating restaurants but the best and biggest ones were private boats docked there.

Out of the total population of Dubai only 17% are local Emiratis (from Wikipedia) while the rest are all migrants. So the small number of people are very rich and live a lavish life style. They drive nice cars like Ferrari, Lamborghini, Bentley, Rolls Royce, BMW, Mercedes Benz and so on. Also they seem to love big four wheelers. SS explained to us that the number plates in Dubai normally have 5 digits but the less number of digits there are on the plate, the more important the person that car belongs to. The Sheik of Dubai drives a car with just the number 1 on the plates.

Burj Al Arab

After walking for a while along the banks of the creek, we were back in the car and off to the famous Jumeirah beach from where we could see the famous Burj Al Arab which is sometimes incorrectly referred to as “the world’s only seven-Star hotel”. Tourists were able to pay and join organised tours of the hotel before but the hotel patrons complained about the noise and inconvenience so they stopped the tours. Now the only way to go inside is either by booking a room there or going for a meal in one of the restaurants located there, otherwise it can only be viewed from the outside.

While we were driving to get there, I saw that the roads in Dubai are very wide and there are lots of cars. The best part was that petrol was only 42 cents a litre while water is 50 cents a litre. Anyways, we parked near Jumeirah beach, near a mosque. As it was evening prayer time, there were lots of people heading towards the mosque wearing traditional Muslim clothes.

As we walked for a few minutes, I could see the iconic Burj Al Arab. It looked magnificent. Just recently I had watched a documentary on how the building was made on the man-made island and knowing those facts made it even more interesting. According to the documentary, they used special bolt technique for the metal poles so even when it expands in the 40-50 degree heat, it doesn’t affect the structural integrity of the building. I was really fascinated by it and if you want to know more do look into this.

AS and me in front of Bruj Al Arab

Here are some facts about Burj Al Arab from the internet.

  • Burj Al Arab also know as Tower of the Arabs is fourth tallest hotel in the world. Burj Al Arab stands on an artificial island 280 m (920 ft) out from Jumeirah beach, and is connected to the mainland by a private curving bridge. The shape of the structure is designed to mimic the sail of a ship. It was built to resemble the sail of a dhow, a type of Arabian vessel. Two “wings” spread in a V to form a vast “mast”, while the space between them is enclosed in a massive atrium. 
  • Despite its size, Burj Al Arab holds only 28 double-story floors which accommodate 202 bedroom suites. The smallest suite occupies an area of 169 m2 (1,820 sq ft), the largest covers 780 m2 (8,400 sq ft).[15] Prices of rooms vary from approximately $1,000 to $27,000 per night.

We took photos in front of it and stayed on the beach for a while. That is one of the few free public beaches in Dubai. There are a few where you need to pay to go inside and the rest are private, either owned by people or some hotel. I saw a lot of families having a BBQ on the beach. Life seemed happy and normal as I sat on the sand and watched the locals enjoy their day off. I am saying this because I got lots of warnings from people on what not to do in Dubai and at one point it had scared me. But sitting by the beach with my husband and friends, I felt happy and I had no worries in the world.

As we had booked to go to the top of Burj Khalifa at 10 pm that night our next stop was going to be Dubai mall. We decided that we were going to have dinner there as well so we hopped into the car for Dubai mall.

The Dubai Mall is the world’s largest shopping mall based on total area. It has 1200 shops and is located in the Burj Khalifa complex. The mall also has Dubai Aquarium, Under Water Zoo and Dubai Ice Rink.

Burj Khalifa

On the way to the mall, when I set my eyes on  Burj Khalifa for the first time, I was mesmerised by its beauty. They were just magnificent and I was more impressed as I had watched Mission Impossible Ghost Protocol. There was lots of traffic going towards the mall and the journey that was normally supposed to take 20 minutes took an hour for us. Mr R dropped us in front of the mall and went looking for parking as he didn’t want us to miss the musical fountain. It was really nice of both of them to make sure that we enjoyed as much as we could while we were there.

  • The Dubai Fountain is a record-setting choreographed fountain system set on the 30-acre manmade Burj Khalifa Lake, at the center of the Downtown Dubai development in Dubai, United Arab Emirates. It was designed by WET Design, the California-based company responsible for the fountains at the Bellagio Hotel Lake in Las Vegas. Illuminated by 6,600 lights and 25 colored projectors, it is 275 m (902 ft) long and shoots water 240 feet into the air accompanied by a range of classical to contemporary Arabic and world music.It was built at a cost of AED 800 million (USD 218 million). 
  • The Dubai Fountain can spray 22,000 gallons (83,000 liters) of water in the air at any moment. More than 6,600 lights and 25 colour projectors have been installed. The Dubai Fountains project water in the air in many different combinations and patterns. The beam of light from the fountain can be seen from over 20 miles away. 
  • The Dubai Fountain consists of many high-pressure water jets and shooters: oarsmen or water robots, which can make the water seem to dance, shooters, which shoot water upwards; super shooters, which shoot water under more pressure up to 240 feet in the air, and extreme shooters, which can shoot water under the most pressure to 420 feet in the air. These shooters create a loud “boom” noise after water is ejected. The super shooters are used the least during each show because it takes a lot of time to build up enough pressure and energy to shoot water that high in the air. After the opening ceremony, the extreme shooters have been closed and still do not perform in the show. 
  • The fountain is animated with performances set to light and music. It is visible from every point on the lake promenade and from many neighbouring structures. Performances take place at 1:00 pm and at 1:30 pm as well as every 30 minutes from 6 pm to 10 pm on weekdays, and from 6 pm to 11 pm on weekends (weekends being Thursday, Friday, and Saturday).

(source wiki)

I have seen the musical fountain in Vegas but this one seemed bigger than that. I really enjoyed the show with Khalifa as the background. After that we went to catch a bite and then it was time for us to go up to see Dubai from Top Of The World.

the magnificent Dubai musical fountain

Our plan was for SS and Mr R to leave us there and we meant to catch a cab back to the hotel but they insisted on waiting for us to take us back themselves. In those short few hours I was touched by their hospitality and kindness many times.

Me in front of Candylicious with M & M

We left them in the mall and went up to see Dubai from the top. It took us more than an hour to finish the tour. We meet SS and Mr. R again and were planning to go back to hotel. Both AS and I were dead tired by then but SS and Mr. R were planning to show more of Dubai that night and made plans to show us more of the Dubai mall. We felt obliged and went to see one of the souk inside the mall as well as the Dubai Mall Aquarium and dropped into Candylicious, the world’s largest candy store.

AS and in front of Dubai mall aquarium

I was really impressed by the way Dubai was planned and made. Definitely one of the grandest places I have ever seen. After another hour of wandering around Dubai mall it was past midnight and they dropped us back to the hotel.

By the time we hit the bed it was past 1 am Dubai time which was 7 am Sydney time and we hadn’t slept since 3am the day before. It makes 28 hours of non stop travel and sightseeing 🙂

When I was trying to sleep, I could hear music coming from the disco located on the first floor of the hotel. I had read about that in the review of the hotel but as I was so tired it didn’t bother me and the next second I was fast asleep and didn’t wake up until 8 am the next morning.

Despite lack of sleep and tiredness, I was already in love with Dubai and it was just day one there.

Here are some of the facts about Dubai that I learnt during the trip

  • The official language is Arabic, Arabic and English are commonly used in business and commerce. Hindi and Urdu are also widely used.
  • You won’t believe this but it is true that over 80% of the residents of Dubai are foreigners. Moreover, about 10000 new residents arrive in Dubai every month.
  • There are no taxes on income.
  • Dubai has the world’s tallest building, the Burj Khalifa standing at 828 metres ( 2,716.5 feet ). It also has the fastest elevators in the world.
  • No matter which part of Dubai you are in, you will hear calls to prayer at least five times a day. Even in shopping malls, the calls to prayer are put out over the speakers, to remind Muslims that it is time to pray.
  • Revenues from petroleum and natural gas contribute less than 6 % to the economy of Dubai.
  • Mall of Emirates in Dubai is featured with an indoor ski resort named Ski Dubai Snow Park and they allow visitors to ski indoors while they shop.
  • The currency in Dubai is the dirham (Dh).
  • The world’s largest horses can be found in Dubai.
  • Dubai has one of the highest per capita incomes in the world.
  • Average annual rainfall in Dubai is only 13 centimetres.
  • While mentioning addresses, street addresses are not mentioned as there are no street addresses in Dubai.

I will be writing more about my trip, hope you will still be interested. :-). Please click here for more photos.

More on Dubai

Hello from the world’s tallest building: Burj Khalifa

Desert safari in Dubai

The Dubai Mall, aquarium and underwater zoo

Dubai city, Souks , Marina, Dubai land & Deira City Centre

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Posted in Travel, UAE

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Back to reality

Posted on June 18, 2012 | 10 comments

Hello everyone, I am back. I apologise for not blogging much for the last 4 weeks as I was very busy. Anyway I have been back for more than 72 hours now and all I have been doing is lots of sleeping. I am not sure which clock my body is following but all I did for the first 24 hours after I got back seemed to be just sleeping.

We landed in Sydney airport and were welcomed by cold and rainy winter. It took a while to clear immigration and customs. As soon as we got into the cab, me and my husband looked at each other and said to each other “Welcome back to the real world.”

I have to admit the best thing about being back home is my warm bed since I have been spending the most time in it. As soon as we got back home, we dumped our suitcases and went to sleep. Even though I had some sleep on the flight (it was 7 hours flight + 4 hours transit + 14 more hours of flight), my body was begging for rest.

So we went to sleep for 6 hours straight. When we woke up both of us were hungry so we ordered a take away and watched TV for a while. As soon as we ate, we felt tired again and off to bed for another 6 hours. We woke up again, talked to our parents to let them know we were back, went for a quick grocery shopping (the fridge was empty) and had our dinner.

AS was working the next day so he had to sleep on time and so we went to bed around 10:30 but even after 2 hours I couldn’t fall asleep so I got up and started surfing the internet. It was probably afternoon in Paris at that time 🙂 Lucky me I had the next day off.

Previously I had gone to work straight from the airport after 16 hours fight from my holiday in USA but this time I am so tired that I am glad that I have an extra day off to rest.

That morning I went to bed around 5 am and woke up at 1 pm. I have never been able to sleep till so late but that morning I didn’t even hear AS leave for work. I was so tired that after I got up at 1 pm just had my breakfast and sat in front of the TV until AS came back from work. I was really dreading going to work the next day.

Anyway, my holiday went exactly as planned and we went to Dubai- Sharjah -Ajman – Brighton –  Devil’s Dyke – Winsor -Wiltshire – Stonehenge – Bath – London – Calais – Holland – Brussels – Frankfurt – Rhine River –  Sankt Goar –  Wurzburg –  Velden – Nuremberg – Prague – Bohemia – Moravia –  Vienna –  Styrian Alps – Venice – Burano – Venetian Lagoon –  Assisi – Rome – Vatican city  – Florence – Como – Lugano – Basel – Flüelen  – Mt.Titlis – Engelberg – Lucern – Danube Valley –  Lake Worth and Carinthia – Paris – Versailles.

There are lots of stories I want to share with you (I have lots of drafts that I wrote on plane and the coach) and it will take me months to do so. This post is to let you all know that I am back and I am still writing 🙂 Thanks everyone for bearing with my absence.

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Published: Facebook Generation

Posted on June 15, 2012 | 6 comments

Please read the previous post if you haven’t don’t so already.

This article was published in +977 (a Nepalese Lifestyle Magazine in Australia) in May- June 2012 issue.

We are the Facebook generation. If you are like me and millions of others then you have Facebook, Twitter, Skype and even a Blog. You can’t pass a single day without surfing the internet and LOL,XOXOand BRB are the most used words, if I may call them so, in your conversation. And you can’t imagine your life without your smart phone and definitely not without internet.

Facebook has changed the way we communicate with our friends and family. It has allowed us to be in touch with our friends and look at their lives in pictures or even videos. In my case, it has reunited me with my friends from my Kindergarten / preschool after 20 years and Facebook has helped me keep in touch with my cousins and relatives who live in different countries. I even became friends with my husband’s relatives in Facebook long before meeting then physically.

With its “What’s on your mind?” question (status update), it has allowed me to know how my friends were feeling and made it easy to wish someone a “Happy Birthday” which I would have never done otherwise and same goes with sharing photos. I used to email photos to multiple people before but now all I have to do is upload them in Facebook and tag the people I want to share the photos with. You know your friends have viewed the photos when you get likes and comments on them.

I have received the news that someone got engaged, married, had a baby, went on a holiday or even died (I am serious) via Facebook. These news would have never made it to my ears (or eyes in this case) if it was not for Facebook so I have to thank Facebook for all that. Also, I have used Facebook’s events function to invite people for birthdays. As everyone I needed to invite to the event was already in Facebook, it just made my planning a lot easier. It has an RSPV option which allowed me to keep track of the guests easily.

Twittering, Blogging and Skyping are a few other things apart from Facebooking that we think are an essential part of our life like the air we breathe, the water we drink and the food we eat. We feel we cannot live without them.

Twittering and following the tweets of celebrities and unknown people, writing a blog to an unknown audience and Skyping instead of talking on the phone has made our life super busy these days as it takes time to manage all our social networks.

So in this busy virtual life have you ever paused for a second and thought about the people in your life, the REAL people, yes I am not talking about your Facebook friends but the real flesh and blood people, friends, family, colleagues, neighbours, people you see every day, people you used to know and who had been an important part of your life. 

Do you have anyone in your life with whom you used to pick up a phone and talk that you stopped because you are so busy with your virtual life now? 

Do you have friends who live overseas and you used to write an email frequently but now stopped writing your emails since they are in your Facebook? 

Do you feel better when someone calls to ask you about your holiday or do you feel better if they comment on your photos on Facebook?

I am asking these questions because I used to be very active on Facebook. I went through a phase (which many of you may identify with) when I felt like I was judged on the number of friends I had in Facebook. It put a lot of pressure on me to accept requests from anyone just so that I could push the number of “friends” ever higher. I have never accepted a request from a total stranger but I have from people who I had just met once and may never meet again in my life. I felt good and popular to have so many “friends”.

I wanted comments and posts on my wall and thought I definitely needed to maintain my Facebook page to keep in touch with former classmates, and relatives who live far away from me. I tried to chat whenever I was online and post regular updates to let them know how my life was rolling. I used to like and comment on other’s posts and photos regularly. I spent lots of time doing this.

Then there was a game called Farmville I played on Facebook. There were many games and still are but this was the one I got hooked on. It was simply too addictive. I actually used to time my life around it and even put alarms to remind me that I have to login and play the game. I spent a lot of time ploughing, harvesting this virtual Farm for points and rewards.

The game started on the lowest level so you wanted to complete it to get to the next one and then the next after that and so on. The game showered you with all these virtual animals and gifts so you can keep going. You even got ribbons that made you feel special. I swear, one time, I spent 3 hours moving my animals and trees to make the farm bigger so I could have extra plots to plant more virtual crops. I was literally becoming a farmer spending so much time on the game. If I had a real farm I’m sure I would have made a lot of money from those produce I grew at the farm.

When I talked to people around me, it was not only me who had that craze. Many of my friends were guilty of this and I saw lots of Status on Facebook saying “Can someone please gift me a horse”, “Why is no one sending me any pigs?” Pigs and Horses were all you thought of all day long. And they weren’t even real! 

Can you believe there were people in this world even crazier than me about the game? They were making cheat sheets for the game and forums were flooded with the questions on how to make points easily so that you could climb up the levels and beat your friends. Also people were spending real money to buy virtual stables or pagodas. God, could we be any more unreal?

That’s the day when lightning struck me (metaphorically of course or I wouldn’t be writing this would I?) I asked myself – “What was I doing with my time on Facebook? Why did I have to be number one among my friends in this stupid game?” I also had no real desire for all of my Facebook friends to know that I went on a holiday or what I liked or who I was with. That day I went and cleaned up my Facebook. I organised my Facebook friends into groups according to their importance in my life. I made sure only a few people who really mattered to me could really see what I did.

Ideally, I should have deleted anyone who was not a part of my life anymore and kept only a few as my friends but I admit I was too chicken to delete them. I didn’t want to hurt their feelings. I was quite sure they wouldn’t notice but I kept thinking about the small percentage who would.

I realised that in real life I have only a handful of friends that I can count on, which means all 300+ friends that I had in my Facebook were not real friends, just people I know. They won’t be there when I need help or advice. They don’t feel sorry when I am down and won’t support me when I need a hand, so should I share my personal thoughts, feelings and my life with these strangers? My answer was definitely a big fat NO.

“I had the most wonderful meal today. :)”, “I went to a spa today.” and so on are just some examples of the Status updates that you can read every day on Facebook. Do you think anyone out there is really interested in that kind of information about your life? Do you care what time your friends wake up, where they go to, what they eat for breakfast, who they are hanging out with? If you don’t really care, do you think anyone else cares about your Status updates?

When I was doing a First Aid Training the other day, the trainer pointed out to us that in case of an emergency (touch wood it never happens) if you need to comfort anyone who is in distress, just go and hug them, as a hug works to calm a person. Real human touch always has magic that no words you type or any comments on Facebook can even compare to. I realised then that we are losing touch with real human bonding due to this virtual social networking.

Another thing that bothers me is the privacy on these social networking sites. I am an IT professional, so I use all my skills to take major precautions to avoid the privacy pitfalls that are ever present on the internet.  I feel sorry for people out there who post all their details on social networking sites without knowing the risks that they face. Putting personal information on Facebook or online in general is not safe and can make you a victim of identity theft and cyber crimes.

Many people will like to have strict control over their personal information which is difficult if you are on Facebook, unless you are very careful not to divulge them. We all like to make sure our personal information is only visible to our trusted friends, not the whole world but the constant updates and frequent changes made by Facebook has made it difficult to keep control of the privacy of our information on Facebook.

First and foremost always be aware of what you are sharing online and with whom. You can edit the privacy option in Facebook so if you have not done so already please go and edit it to make your personal information secure. Make sure your contact information is private and control who can access your information like photos, wall information and status updates. It is easy to stop sharing information with total strangers. If you don’t know how, just Google it and you should find tutorials on how to do it. Be aware and alert every moment.

Someone wise once said, “We realise the value of time only once we are old” so let’s balance our life and utilise our time from now so we don’t regret it in the future. There is no harm in being on Facebook but also make sure you have friends you can connect to outside of it. Call a friend instead of leaving a comment on their post, try to hug a friend instead of “poking” them on Facebook and definitely have a few real friends than just the hundreds of virtual friends online. We should always admire and appreciate what is innovative so there is nothing wrong in building your social networks on Facebook but don’t forget the real world while you are chasing the virtual one.

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